Parodies on what appears at first to be straightforward.
I was going to tell some of my friends about a special secret diet I was on but I was afraid that Marge and Flora would spread it all over. I also heard about a cat called Marmalade being stuck in a jam and because of this was not the flavour of the month. A row occurred with another friend called Olive who went red all over when she was told to get stuffed.
Olive got into further confrontation when she went to a butchers to ask for some black puddings but she was accused by the butchers of being racist. When I was told of this and shown an article in a newspaper about racism I could not argue as it was all in black and white.
I went to a restaraunt which was pretty wall packed to capacity to have a bowl of toadstool soup but when I went in I was told that I couldn’t because there wasn’t mushroom left for me to sit down to eat. I did manage to have my photograph taken by a resident photographer in the restaraunt. With being tired and hungry at the time I made a snap decision and tried not to look so negative for the phtograph. After asking to sit down for a minute I was allowed to have a drink as by now I was feeling and looking faint. The waiter must have had a bizarre sense of humour because he brought a cup with a cut out of the 20th letter of the English alphabet in it and said to me ‘Here is the cup of ‘T’(ea) you asked for.
When I left the restaraunt I met Olive again outside and because it was getting late she suggested that we go home with a taxi. I said it would be too expensive but she said she had a couple in her bag as they were nice chocolate bars to eat. I had bought some boxes of chocolate already for when we got home as we all like to have a party and celebrations I wanted to get some helicopter flavoured crisps but the shops I went to only sold plain (plane). I also got some loaves as I knew at this rate we were going to end up on the bread line.
I was asked by my family to go to Iceland to get some fish but I did not know where I could get a flight to go there at the time. The butcher who used to be there used to also sell fish but he went bankrupt as he just could not make ends meet (meat). If I got fish there when I shopped I always managed to keep my soul (sole) into what I was doing and I managed to keep my place (plaice) there. I decided to have a hobbies and transport themed party one night and prepared plates of chocolates and buscuits such as Taxies, Galaxies, Bounties, Mars, Milky Ways and Double Deckers.
I was afraid that I might cause a territorial problem when I wanted to prepare some national or regional type dishes but if I prepared or bought some Yorshire Puddings and Lancashire Hot Pots in order to equal things out. The party went with a bang expecailly when fireworks were set off by accident in the room. The electrician who was there had a shocking experiende but trtied to remaid positive and down to earth when the car dealer had a brush with the broom salesman and a wahing powder sales rep but after the car dealer went home and sorted out the issue everything came out in the wash. With the help of another party goer who was a washing powder salesman they all managed to make a clean start again after they all cleaned their acts up.